The AWS Health Dashboard (https://health.aws.amazon.com/health/status) reports no issues at all. But DownDetector (https://downdetector.com/status/aws-amazon-web-services/) shows a spike in reports.
I can't even reach the AWS console through my phone.
So, AWS has connectivity issues to certain networks and their own health dashboard is lying to us about it. What gives?
(All of this accurate as of 2:10 pm CST).
Update: as of 2:26 pm CST, the health dashboard reports that they are "investigating an issue". So, 45 minutes after Down Detector sees it, they do.